a things happened lately, got myself to think, from here to there, resetting my mind, like a normal daily issue. 

word that just stuck in my head lately, 

when you float, you have no idea which bottom or top

just like those feeling when I jump off 75 feet dam in Sumatra, those feeling when you burst into the water, and lost into the deep of water. it was dark, can’t see which top or bottom, panic, yea that’s what happened. you would too if you don’t come up to surface within 20 sec.

i have no idea what will it come those days just an adrenaline junkie with my dear unc, i was 12-13 at the time.

and now i have that feeling perpetually going on, yea i guess i know why, but whatevs. have a bigger goal to reach, not purely an ambition. just a man on mission.

but the point of this post is, I randomly type ‘people who were born on 25th of Dec, in google, and found most of them are people that i have no clue about, beside newton n buncha others’

 so does i fixed ‘were born 28th of april’

to find, this line up a lot more catch my eye

here’s buncho’ em

Penelope Cruz, she’s the second person that glance my eyes, cause the real first one was jessica alba, but nope, she’s not really on this list. anyway, lopecruz, this exotic psychoidiotic babe i admire, never thought we share the same day. woot

so i just keep on reading them list blabla bla bla blabla mr this mrs that

and BAM ! guess who celebrate my fucking birthday in middle east ?

thats right baby, Saddam Hussein is, well idk whatchu think about dudes, but i dont even know him, papers wrote him as bad guy, and i dont even know the writer, so why should i be hatin on this guy. beside his free medical offer, free education and even electricity across the country, from oil money he skilled

fuck i wrote a real nice paragraph, stupid ass pop up and i accidentally closed the tab. aw man, now i got no fucking mood to write, what an asshole

okay anyway, and the list go on, there’s 

KIM MOTHAFUCKIN GORDON, nawyeknow how funk 28th apriler’s rolls

there’s moar great people to moot, but too bad stupid accident is real buzz killer, kills anything but a big bad mood.

fun fact

Pehr Gyllenhammar, CEO of Volvo (1971-90) and Jay Leno celebrate their day, on the same date, and most importantly, their interest toward car

not speaking of our beloved Ferruccio Lamborghini were born on the 28th of April too

these kind of unrelated information subconsciously matched a whole lotta my unrelated information, that builds nothing but motivation in this industry that I’m doing right now. with these much of talents, hunger of competition and kills for job kinda mindset, yea, massive self motivation and ambition is what I need. well i guess too bad, i was not really dudes who fetch, but in other way, world is a mess, and money do favor in any ways you want. so blah whatevs

thought about these earlier, there was once small group of intelligence living in harmony, till the idea of trading stuff with value, came and build these once straight sighted sapiens, turns army of greed. money that’s what they call em’

so much idea that i wanted to type earlier, cockblocked nicely by chrome tab, nah, matter fact, ima watch something after this, and eat ramen and sleep

but what i was trying to say was, i see so much potential of what im gon be in future time, by just admiring these peeps achievement. time’s rough now, well when a man comfortably shares his problem, either he doesnt give a fuck or he already ‘knows’. of the consequence, of this of that, this ‘knows’ quite cliche, and im way too hungry to explain it, but i hope you get the idea

so i’ll just drop the word adios, and enjoy your holiday

later skater

ha, back..

as the title say, kinda got me thinking recently, of what is maturity, what is growing up, identity crisis, and state of mind. it’s funny how I used to think that i might actually is a lot mature or whatever you name it, 5 years back. in the peak where that boy wears bathing ape purple sweaterwith lv coin pouch swaggin walking with attitude, but yet that guy, knows how to talk to a woman. ( ehm, lemme make it clear, some woman.. some woman, kid ;) ) anyway, 

first idea come

later second idea, that later third, fourth and then BAM ! THE SPECTACULAR idea has arrived, people who come out with other idea watch and learn slowly

the next day

most of the idea inspired from the first SI ( spectacular idea ), and that’s how it goes

idea fifty six, idea fifty seven, idea fiftyy eight and BAM! another spectacular idea that concern about other stuff

and so on, with idea that cover all,

SI that covers earth sustainability, this that this that, million minds out there are thinking hard to giving a birth into an idea that could guarantee their life for at least, the next meal. 

and it just keep on rolling for 2 thousand years, and to find that 

actually i did too much research that i forgot to write this shit back, nvm, catch it later

something odd is when, i realize that I’m like infinite weed. well technically not infinite, but more like regenerate THC smoke producer that makes high lika a ninja pie.

i will cherish, stone, mellow, paranoia people feeling like im mary, 

me, the infinite weed

SEVEN BILLION PEOPLE. and i’m number 6.813.394.402.340

you know what. i don’t know if it’s cus of beer that i had earlier or whatsoever,

but most probably is because of books that i read these couple of days. it kinda make me mind not if tomorrow is the end of the world. you know, dajjal comes out of sky, earths cracking, tidal wave, plane crushing, godzilla dancing, cthulu jingle-ing, santa shot heroine, freddy jason playin human chest, get it, chess. ahahah fucking qp and his dumb word play - SK. anyway, you get the picture. and i don’t even have a due, well i have, but not as intense as how it usually. like i just wanna prove a point for some who’s blinded by the sun of fear. it sounds ignorant, to think that way, but hey guess what. it’s me who typed on this blog ! ha! succkkeerr! but anyway, 

what i meant to say is.. that not everyone is lucky, ya know ? you probably dont know

it’s cool, let’s not knowing, it’s a lot more convenient and keeps the mind peace on flat constancy. IZGEWD!

I had a leather jacket, i call it B, the same name as my last beautiful baby ( read : car ) call me suck at naming, but you know what ? i suck at naming

every time i’m under pressure, I often imagine the world would be slightly gloomy, like 5-10% dimmer. not only that, a lots of people disappear as well ( so the scene would be more horrific. and i’ll just rock the jacket, hit the road ready with stock of papers and lighter. and i dont know………..

 do what i gotta do

- later that day -

kill zombies, find weed, make a base, meet other survival, survive as long as we can, and finally die trying. <- i can assure you that this part would be cool if they made a movie about it.

but anyway, seven billion is kind of ridiculous number, I understand that earth could contain human up to 15 billion people ( both pole is not counted ) but hey, can we human live with that much of competition ?

shelter, food and clothes, we all know the basic needs of human, and each da, we human creates new thing. yes in some way I’m proud of it, but with uncontrollable number of population I’m afraid that not every one has enough love to grow up with. ya know, 

this is out of context of starvation in Africa, poverty in Everywhereslavakia , and any other potent reason to built; a born to kill kinda personality, not as in kill, kill. but ambitious, strong will, but what if that most important part of it is unchip. let’s say they’re the new version of iphone 10, but they forgot to put chips on it.

and why am i talking all this bullshit, but anyway, call me drunk, or wasted, or high, which is right now i think ima just do my work after this cigarette, but. i somehow cares not if thee day is come.

oh ya and 1 thing, I wanna told girl that i talk to recently about something, but she’s busy showing her new stuff, so i guess i’ll just write it here. 

i used to be a good guy, well, it’s not that i go around and kill people now, but you know life fucks you so many time without even saying love, call, nor email. 

so much thing i wanna say, like

1. i can use money that you have, not you reader. i’m talking to all those rich peopre who like to show their material stuff in social network, better than you do.
p.s : okay maybe i’m not the best at spending money, cus i might ended up buying weed, getting high, but at least, i know how to share. <- for that, i am not just saying.

2.a. I feel like a left tits right now,

2.b. your perception may vary 

3. if i’m in my hometown, probably right now i’ll blast my speaker off, rolling up blunt. matter fact scratch that, ———-too much things i wanna do back in hometown, but first of all. i’ll meet my homie, that later we gon do what we were born to do. to have fun.

perhaps if i’m by myself, i would not bother to write desperately looking for someone to talk to, I know it is pathetic, but yea. probably in this age, in this peak of NERD RAGE of BAD BRAINNESS, HORRORCORE kind of state of mind, this is probably the only way to save my sanity. nah, it’s not that sanity, sanity that we’re talking about. it’s the last string of 49823049203’s my strings of sanity.

4. i will be a rockstar, and you have my word.

you have my axe

and you shall have my bow

and you shall have my beard - norris

5. listening to my own record, permanent fuck the pigs attitude, rockin the mic, get into a brawl over something that I stood up for, is enough reason for me to smile and said, hey.. hey hey apple. hey apple hey, hey. you know

sincerely dude’s number 6.813.394.402.340

to the rest of the world.

and don’t kill animal, unless they bite you, mosquito is not counted as an animal they’re jackass.

but i don’t mind running around town with tiger cape. that shit is straight up FAYAH!

okay i’ll talk to you later, staker

i dreamt of woods, breezy weather, fogs and buddha calm mind ecstasy

and matter fact is away of friends, away of cash, family, dont ask, away of herbs, and sick of music. said once that i better find a partner of life. i refuse, its nt the 80’s where you can just slap a bitch if you dont like what they do as housewife. it’s something that is more complex, yes yes i understand the importance of another being living in a parallel whether thick and thin. i’m an educated retard who drops panties for something odd.  no, i’m not that special snowflake or that extra 5 sec when god made me, i’m just another species that was awaken, because of prolly my old man doesnt even has a condom at that time. we’ll be back in this topic in a sec

well if this world is flat some way, you’ll see me my chat box appear yellow

i always thought that i broke the 4th wall, well, appears like that to me, 

hahh, idk, i care not about grammar, ergonomic reading of the reader, my future cat ( i really am getting a cat in the future )

i am ( i wanna put fuck on it, but im not in the mood ) hungry

ALL I KNOW IS THAT ( put a capslock so i can be KEYBOARDIZASTER )

and this stupid lecturer keep on saying queszhyionnedh? enormous ego motherfucker, i really dont mind to bash him ego sometime if i really good at alias, too bad————-much thang to learn.

stupid car model, nah nah, matter fact scratch that, stupid ass model

nah, stupid ass progress, nah everything just seems dumb right now

fuck,

my car model is different one another, now that i have to adjust it first on photoshop, that later i have to redo this alias model from zero, and since i’ve done 40% at least of my modeling in clay, there’s no way i can change much of the design there. note taken

question is, when will i do that all again ? i do not knowledge the answer yet.

everytime i got home, im just sitting on my stupid ass uncomfortable chair, or my relaxing but not maximize comfort sofa, and stupid ass table that shaped like a nascar outerspace jet. in pretty small space

you know what, i think all this rooted from things that did not ever exist on the first place called money. concept.

i need some of that paper, especially the one with logo £ and 500, i like them a lot, cus with only that 1 paper, you can have 500 coins, or 250 of bigger coins, or you can have like ehm 250 double cheeseburger with that 16 x 8 cm size of purple paper. boom ! 

imagine if you have like, 500 of them„ no no no, ehmm. 50 of them would be good for now actually,

okay so let’s say i have the money„ ehmmm… what will i do ya„

i really wanna go to cali real bad, but ehm you know other circumstance involved. well, not money obviously cause i have 25grand on my pocket.

nyeh, gotta off, i’ll be back later

7 billions people

on earth.

question, do we still have space left ? we sure does

but again, if the majority of people who has incredible power, status, seats and been too long on the game really concerned about their family, well.. who is then responsible for all this ?

it’s not a human fault if every being wants to have legacy. yet the place we living now isn’t as simple 2000 years back, when the number of human still err.. let’s say in-amount-that-easy-to-reach-one-another

it only takes 180 years for human to generate 6 billion people. 

2020 would be beautiful, for some

i believe in odd

and the last word